It's too difficult to name this.
Thanks for tuning into this, I don’t know what this is but hopefully, it will have a structure. A beginning, a middle and an end. To get you all into the grove of this article and to help you wind down let me start off with a music recommendation:
Right down the line by Gerry Rafferty
Now that we have the tunes in let's go down the rabbit hole am planning to dive in.
Fortune/ Luck is such a weird concept. How do you define luck? I think the interpretation of this word is vast and varied. Today the focus of my understanding of the word Luck will be the concept that a series of unplanned events which could have turned disastrous just works out in your favour and helps you let you go off the hook without much damage.
I believe I am a very lucky man, there have been N number of instances when my luck has helped me avoid periods of intense pain. But there has always been a part where my luck has not really worked out in any way.
It has been relationships, as in romantic ones. I have an insanely nice group of friends and people who I consider close friends and family are just the cream of the crop. However, just like some Shakespearean plays, my love life has been tragic you can call the theme a tragedy.
(Now that was the beginning)
I once met someone, who was my ex-colleague who was my first-ever girlfriend, and it was so nice how that relationship bore fruit, it was very organic. It was not rushed at all we started talking and then one fine day we started dating, but yes there was a significant push from my end to do that, but that push was heard and well reciprocated.
It was long distance tho, I was in Kerala she was in Banglore. We were two different people we had nothing in common. She was very flowery and peppy tho. This was a stark contrast from the person I had met. When I met her, she was very introverted and would hardly even look at someone in their eyes when they used to talk to her.
Now things were different, I met her at a mall after a long time, she looked as elegant as ever that day, and I was as confused as ever just dazzled. One, because I had never been on a date before this and this is my first ever date. And two I was not sure what to do here.
The day went by like a blur, we went for a movie talked for a while and it was very nice. Well, she talked I listened, but for someone who could not stop yapping. I did not yap that day, and that day for someone who I remember never used to yap kept yapping.
Then slowly we started talking every day over the phone, talking every day and I was hooked at that point, we had fun little getaways together and things were going well. A little too well. The thing was I was never able to understand what we were. I was ushered into the modern dating era where terms like casual meant things that my peabrain could not comprehend. Let's just say expectations and my reality did not align. And that ended up as a shitshow.
Calling it a shitshow was an understatement, the sheer lack of communication that had happened there was just insane, we talked but we never communicated. We just fought day in and day out. Ultimately both of us called it quits and I was back to square one. Nobody and the persistent feeling of overwhelming loneliness washed upon me like how the water rushes into the ocean.
But I was healing, I was recovering meeting new people, and suddenly she started to ask me how I was doing, she called to check in on me. I never understood this creature whom I had dated, she showed that she cared but as soon I asked her to care she was dismissive. She would act all dazed and confused. And this was just getting a bit too much to comprehend.
You either let the other person go, or you don't try to push them away, this was like that Malayalam quote which says "Pashu ottu thinnem illa, pashu ottu theetikem illa" It roughly translates to, "The cow neither eats the fodder nor lets others eat it," often used to describe someone who blocks progress without contributing themselves.
The whole idea of the blog was to emphasise the fact that you should not be the Pashu in other people's lives, if you are unsure about what you want please let the other person be in peace. Do not reach out back to your ex, they are your ex for a reason. Please let them be in peace. Do not stroke your ego with the lube of other person tears :) Don't be that guy.
(That was the end, I don’t know if there was a middle to the story but I know I feel better)
Right down the line by Gerry Rafferty
Now that we have the tunes in let's go down the rabbit hole am planning to dive in.
Fortune/ Luck is such a weird concept. How do you define luck? I think the interpretation of this word is vast and varied. Today the focus of my understanding of the word Luck will be the concept that a series of unplanned events which could have turned disastrous just works out in your favour and helps you let you go off the hook without much damage.
I believe I am a very lucky man, there have been N number of instances when my luck has helped me avoid periods of intense pain. But there has always been a part where my luck has not really worked out in any way.
It has been relationships, as in romantic ones. I have an insanely nice group of friends and people who I consider close friends and family are just the cream of the crop. However, just like some Shakespearean plays, my love life has been tragic you can call the theme a tragedy.
(Now that was the beginning)
I once met someone, who was my ex-colleague who was my first-ever girlfriend, and it was so nice how that relationship bore fruit, it was very organic. It was not rushed at all we started talking and then one fine day we started dating, but yes there was a significant push from my end to do that, but that push was heard and well reciprocated.
It was long distance tho, I was in Kerala she was in Banglore. We were two different people we had nothing in common. She was very flowery and peppy tho. This was a stark contrast from the person I had met. When I met her, she was very introverted and would hardly even look at someone in their eyes when they used to talk to her.
Now things were different, I met her at a mall after a long time, she looked as elegant as ever that day, and I was as confused as ever just dazzled. One, because I had never been on a date before this and this is my first ever date. And two I was not sure what to do here.
The day went by like a blur, we went for a movie talked for a while and it was very nice. Well, she talked I listened, but for someone who could not stop yapping. I did not yap that day, and that day for someone who I remember never used to yap kept yapping.
Then slowly we started talking every day over the phone, talking every day and I was hooked at that point, we had fun little getaways together and things were going well. A little too well. The thing was I was never able to understand what we were. I was ushered into the modern dating era where terms like casual meant things that my peabrain could not comprehend. Let's just say expectations and my reality did not align. And that ended up as a shitshow.
Calling it a shitshow was an understatement, the sheer lack of communication that had happened there was just insane, we talked but we never communicated. We just fought day in and day out. Ultimately both of us called it quits and I was back to square one. Nobody and the persistent feeling of overwhelming loneliness washed upon me like how the water rushes into the ocean.
But I was healing, I was recovering meeting new people, and suddenly she started to ask me how I was doing, she called to check in on me. I never understood this creature whom I had dated, she showed that she cared but as soon I asked her to care she was dismissive. She would act all dazed and confused. And this was just getting a bit too much to comprehend.
You either let the other person go, or you don't try to push them away, this was like that Malayalam quote which says "Pashu ottu thinnem illa, pashu ottu theetikem illa" It roughly translates to, "The cow neither eats the fodder nor lets others eat it," often used to describe someone who blocks progress without contributing themselves.
The whole idea of the blog was to emphasise the fact that you should not be the Pashu in other people's lives, if you are unsure about what you want please let the other person be in peace. Do not reach out back to your ex, they are your ex for a reason. Please let them be in peace. Do not stroke your ego with the lube of other person tears :) Don't be that guy.
(That was the end, I don’t know if there was a middle to the story but I know I feel better)
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